Fly Trap

^_^

I got a question for ya’s.

Gotta pop you a q.

Reeeaaal quick.

Pop ya a quick q.

Here goes…

Are you a bad vegan if you swat a fly?

Cuz I dunno, man.

Or lady.

Or anybody in between.

I just dunno.

Because all the little bugs and strange critters out there are alive, and we’re not supposed to be killin’ anything.

But some of these dang flies dude. They’re just straight up fuggin’ w/ me in the house now that the hot summer winds are winding through and all of the screens are up and the latches are open to let the outside in. And, mostly, it’s a downright beautiful thang.

But dang.

Some of these flies are drivin’ me loco.

Ima come clean here.

I’ve swatted some flies.

I try and be good to all the living tings out there, no matter how many legs or wings or carapaces or what have
you are involved.

I sometimes scoop em up w a small sheet of paper and a glass jar and release them into the hot Detroit air so they can go on living out their buggy little existences.

I sometimes open up the doors and windows and woosh air at them in a certain direction to suggest that they split on their own accord.

I talk to spiders that I see lurkin’ in room corners and I tell them, hey bud, if you leave me alone, I’ll do you the same.

We make a pact.

The spider and me.

It’s a beautiful and solemn pact that spiders, as a whole, typically uphold.

I’ve even scooped up ants and let em go outside.

Ants dude.

I’ve scooped up centipedes and let em go outside too.

Centipedes dude.

But it’s a funky little line that we draw, isn’t it?

Where does sanity end and where does cruelty begin?

Me?

I just say do yr best.

If you gotta swat a fly here and there or hunt down some bed bugs or smack a mosquito or two to stop them from suppin’ on yr sweet sweet blood, then I still think that yr doing just fine.

Just do yr best.

Exercise compassion whenever and however you can.

Exercise kindness and gentleness as often as yr able.

But if somethin’s suppin’ on my blood, we got a leetle problemo. And that’s a problem-o that I can solve right quick. Smack! And fr real, I will probably just go on doin’ the same thang in ze future.

Again…

I don’t really know where the line is here.

We all live w a leetle hypocrisy in our lives, like it or not.

You just gotta choose yr battles.

Well that’s my hot take anyway; my two cents.

And, whew, you know what?

All this bug talk has got me feelin’ huuuuuuuuuungry.

Haw haw — well, I guess that the bug talk didn’t really make me hungry.

I was already hungry.

And the original hunger just lasted throughout all the bug talk.

It was not spurred or intensified by the bug talk.

I’m not some sick-o bug muncher.

Though, full disclosure,  I have swallowed many a fruit fly that drowned themselves in my lemonade as a result of their sugary greed.

But what’s all this bug schtuff got to do w what’s up for us Veghedz today?

Good q.

I’ll tell yah.

We’re goin to The Fly Trap to smash on some of their fine fine veggie fare.

Hot take #2; Fly Trap is a great restaurant.

It’s got that perfect and almost unfindable diner diner zone going. The food is supa fuggin’ gooda, there’s a full bar, there’s a chiller vibe, and, almost more importantly (but I guess not really more importantly) than any of that other schtuff, they have salt and pepper shakers that look like sandals or like pigs or like elephants or like peapods or like underwear or like ______.

Hot take #3; if a place has wild-ass salt and pepper shakers, it is probably a great place to get food. This is just a general rule of thumb.

And oh yeah!

They don’t just have hot sauces.

They make their own.

And they are all fuggin’ BANG-ING.

Drink that in for a moment.

Who makes their own hot sauces?

I’ll tell ya who.

Nobody.

That’s who.

Nobody but ze Fly Trap.

Hot take #4; if a place makes their own hot sauce(s), it’s gonna be a good place to eat. That’s just a simple and well-understood fact; like the sky looking blue or a beer tasting better when it’s hot outside.

Anywhodaddily, on to the meal!

For dranks, S got a lil whiskey w her coffee and I got a bloody mary that’s made w their in-house bloody blend, which is good AF.. You can see all the little peppercorns and spices dancin’ and danglin’ around in the bottom of the glass and you can taste ‘em dancin’ and danglin’ in yr mouth. It’s a good effect.

Huevos Rancheros (Minus the huevos and add the tofus)
We’ve been to Fly Trap a dozen or so times, and this is my favorite thing on the menu. It’s not a dish that’s regularly served vegan, but the substitutions are easy. Take out the eggs and the sour cream, and add tofu and avocado. If you want to have the creme de la creme perfect version that I’ve honed in on over the course of time, add the tempeh too. I don’t know what’s goin’ on w/ the tempeh at Fly Trap, but it’s fuggin goooooood. It’s got this like almost juicy grilled flavor going on and it just works so well w the crispy tortilla, seasoned black beans, avocado, tofu, tomato, onion, etc etc. It sounds like a breakfast dish, but this thang works morning, noon and night. Puttin in OT on the weekends. Payin’ off tempeh student loans. 401tempehk. Re(tempeh)tirment plan. Etc, etc.

Gingerbread Waffles
All you gotta do to this one is ask for it vegan. They just do the fruit toppings w/o butter instead of w/ it. You ever had gingerbread? You ever had waffles? Mix those two sweet little babes up and you get this dish. It’s as great as it sounds. Served w dried cherries, cinnamon maple syrup, and stewed apples. Yowa kabowa!

Veggie Rumble
This is like what you would make for yrself in the morning after you got good at being vegan. Tofu and potatoes make up the base, and the seasonal veggies are stirred into the skillet. The seasoning is dang good and the veggies are always cooked right on point.

If you’ve ever gotten food out and thought to yrself I could have made this at home — it’s almost like that, but you’d have to add I could have made this at home *if I were a really solid cook. Not a really solid cook? Get this shyt. They’ll take care of it for you. It’s delicious.

Well my budz and budettes, that does it for this one.

Is swatting a fly vegan?

Fugg it, I dunno.

Use yr own head and your own discretion.

But the Fly Trap does have some rippin’ schlippin’ plant-based options, and you should czech ‘em out.

xoxo
Love n’ kisses
Hugs n’ roses
Candycane dreams
Lolipop memes
Freckles,

J

PS get here EARLY if yr doing breakfast/early lunch. They fill
up quick.