Jerusalem Pizza & Bagel

Price Range: $$
Parking: Big Ol’ Parking Lot
Menu: Omni/Vegan options
Food Sourced: TBD
Environmentally Sustainable:
no Styrofoam
Outdoor Seating: A couple’a picnic tables out front
Hours: Sun-Thurs= 7am-8pm, Fri= 7am-1pm, Sat= CL



Gal mes nich zitc nen zagga mar!

Goez zecht mil sed micha ren tel qualla nen seg mey…

Nez mel sacht quel nes teb, zeg neff sella mecht.

Do you know what language that is?

You could cheat and plug it into google translate.

Or I could just tell you what that language is and save you that nanosecond.

It’s called dog shyt.

And it is an ancient language full of subtlety and nuance that came to me just now in a waking sleep.

In a thousand years, it’s truths will be revealed.

But until then, suffice it to say that that passage is a benevolent teaching written in the forgotten or yet to be recalled tongue of dog shyt.

And what’s that got to do with this Quick Gripz?


That’s a little Spanish I threw at ya.



Etc. etc…


You know what language is spoken across all tongues and relatable to all tongues within mouths?



And Jerusalem Pizza is a friggin gem.

Tons of vegan options. Tons of vegan (meats). Vegan Canadian Bacon? Yep. They’ve got it.

I speak real good Canadian too.

By the way.

But this is a quick gripz and so let me give you the quick grip. The dough is delicious. In fact, they do their own breadz and doughz and bagelz, etc. It’s kinda their
main squeeze.

And so you betta believe it’s done right.

They’ve got every topping you ever heard of and then a bunch more.

They’ve got vegan chz, their sauce is on point, and they do breadsticks, sandwiches, and anything else you could think of from a ‘za joint.

If you’ve had just about every other ‘za around and you need to make tonight’s or today’s or this morning’s grip a leetle bit extra special — head over to Jerusalem. It’ll be a dang treat.

AND if you want to get a leetle clothing grip in while yr at it, there’s a Salvation Army in the same strip.

Don’t buy new clothes. That’s fuggin’ ridiculous. Future landfill products.

Buy new pizza’s.

They’re a lot better than new clothes.

Grip on sistas and bruthas,

Lots of love,



Pictured Below: Large custom Veg Chez pizza and Veg Chickie Sammie (hold the mayo)

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