Pie Sci

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I’ve gotta pop you a Q real quick…

Have you ever met anybody that’s just freaked out by soy?

Lawd knows I have.

There are loads of them out there, scuttling around.

You may know one and not even know you know one…

Spooky.

Now I don’t mean people who are allergic to soy and are freaked out by it for that reason.

That is, after all, a perfectly sound reason to be freaked out by something.

I mean the ones that think that soy is gonna do some freaky deaky shyt to them if they were to be duped into ingesting the wild schtuff.

*The women in the soy is freaky shyt camp tend to believe that it’ll cause infertility and breast cancer, while the men in the soy is freaky shyt camp believe that it’ll lower their testosterone, lower their sperm count, make them grow breasts, then give those newly grown soyful breasts cancer.

So the women think it’s gonna kill them, and the men think that it’s going to turn them into women and then kill them afterward.

Yikes.

That’s some funky schtuff.

And the thing that’s funkier still about all of this is that those who are in the soy is freaky shyt camp — men and women alike — all have one really strange thing in common.

When they talk about soy, they emanate this smell.

Wild, no!?

It’s sort-of earthy, but sort-of spoiled…

Sort-of malty, but gnarled with rot…

A little moldy, and definitely corroded…

Hmmmm….

I had a hard time pinning it down right away.

But eventually, on a morning walk passing by a neighbor’s yard, it came to me…

It’s dog shyt!

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Now, people smelling like dog shyt is wayyy more common than you’d think. 

It’s a super common side effect of ingesting disinformation online or elsewhere, boiling it down to a burbling fluid with the acids in your stomach, and allowing it to pass into your bloodstream. From there, it travels to the brain where it rots the wrinkled tissues at the edges producing a feculent odor. Then that odor does a quick loop-di-loop through yr respiratory system, and then this disinformation finally is regurgitated and comes out yr mouth smelling just like dog shyt.

The human body is a marvel!

There is, of course, one problem with that last little paragraph there, 

and that is its unfortunate untruthfulness.

I admit it…

It is as untrue as the “information” out there espousing that soy is something which causes all of these ailments for which it is blamed.

It’d be nice if it were true though; that disinformation really did get turned into fetid dog shyt stink by the human body.

It’d make it so much easier to sniff out.

Haw haw.

But it doesn’t have an odor.

Not one that is perceptible to the human nose, anyway.

And so we must use the only available tool which is appropriately tuned to pick up on the almost gamma-wave like invisible rays and stinking vibrations of dog shyt; SCIENCE!

To break it down real quick, the thangs in soy that some people are afraid of are phytoestrogens.

They are afraid of phytoestrogens because phytoestrogen has the word estrogen in it.

And people are terrified of estrogen *see above; developing breast cancer, developing breasts, etc, etc..

But what these people do not realize is that while excesses of hormone estrogen can be linked to all of those thangs, phytoestrogen is not hormone estrogen.

I know that nuance escapes so many of us, but just because two thangs share a word in common does not make them the same thang.

Who knew!? 

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In fact, phytoestrogens, albiet a similar compound and a similar word, are very different from
hormone estrogen in an important way.

And without diving too far into it, phytoestrogens can actually be linked to the prevention or even reversal of the negative effects of excessive hormone estrogen such as breast cancer, etc. because of their similar but inequivalent compound makeup!

For the real scientific lowdown on this offered by actual scientist and doctor researchers , czech out these sources;

https://www.fertstert.org/article/S0015-0282(09)00966-2/pdf

https://www.fertstert.org/article/S0015-0282(10)00368-7/pdf

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/23725149

Ahhh, did you get the delicious whiff of that!? Ooooof sweet baby, it’s the heady perfume of science.

Breathe that shyt in.

But anywhodaddily, the nitty got dang gritty is this; phytoestrogens are different from hormone estrogen and their consumption by humans does not lead to all of the wild dang dog shyt that all of these got dang fearmongers (a group which includes  women-fearing conspiracy theorists a-la Alex Jones and co., and the meat and dairy industries to name a few) would have you believe.

All right alllllll right, allllllll riiiiiight…I know… 

What’s all this science talk got to do with today’s VegHedz post?

Well, it’s simple, we’re munchin’ down on some Pie Sci!

And though the food at Pie Sci isn’t riddled with those terrifying phytoestrogens (though they do offer some)

They’ve both got ‘science’ right in their name.

So they gotta be the same thing.

Haw haw.

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But for real…

We went to Pie Sci this week’s Quick Gripz, and here are some thangs we’d like to say about it.

Pie Sci is right in the dang belly of Woodbridge, and if yr familiar w the area then you know that there’s a bunch of shyt right around there you can do while yr there; get a coffee, hit some shops, get yr bike tuned up, get yrself a ‘live, laugh, love’ tattoo,  w/e…

And with the Wayne State field within eyesight, you can even do some post-pie division 2 streaking if that’s yr thang.

Up 2 u

On the inside, Pie Sci is super chill and casual. You can dine in but it’s not a table service spot, and in the warm months there is also patio seating out back in case you prefer mowing yr pie to the sounds of croaking cicadas, shrieking birds, and street traffic — which I kind-of do for w/e reason.

And most importantly… 

When it comes to the pie, it’s fuggin’ delicious.

And though the crust (now one of my two favorites in the city), sauces, and ingredients are all got dang scrumptious, which is a word that I am careful to use only when something is really a special kind of tasty, I think the stand outs about Pie Sci are their equal focus on veggie options, making them clear and easy to find, and just as if not more delicious than their omnivorously-tuned counterparts — and secondly their topping choices. 

Sometimes what they’ve got grouped together on a pizza sounds like I’m not gonna eat that shyt, but you should do yrself a favor a trust ‘em and go for it. Whenever we have we’ve been happily rewarded like we were last time when we got the veganified large square Sammy Samosa (pictured below). At first I was pretty apprehensive about having any form of ketchup on my ‘za and so we ordered it with the tamarind ketchup on the side, but after tasting how well it worked with everything else, I was going Jackson Pollock w that shyt on every slice.

It was a real good fuggin pie.

Weeeeelll that’s that for another Quick Gripz, my frands.

Go forth with science,

Go forth with ‘za,

Phytoestrogens are fuggin fine dude,

Xoxo

J